Nathan Thomas Beene
Here are the Nathanisms we've collected so far.
Eddit Haskel, Re-born!Our hearts melted with what we heard, but we had to grin at the same time. Nathan recently told us that "I'm such a lucky boy to have grandparents like you!". On the same day, he told his Aunt Amy "Daniel is lucky to have a mom as good as you!".
Happy to Be AliveNathan and I were talking about how happy his cousin Daniel always seems. Nathan asked if he was happy when he was born. I told him not in the first few minutes, but after his mother held him he was smiling. He said "Well Papa, I was just happy to be borned!"
Lined UpNathan was explaining that at the end of school (2nd grade) a female friend of his told him that she liked him. He wanted to reciprocate and told her that "I like you too. You're third on my list of girl friends!". I'm afraid the boy has a lot to learn about tact.
Biological WizardIn a discussion of parthenogenesis in the animal kingdom, I explained to Nathan that it meant females having children without men. He understood immediately, and said "That's just like my mom did!". It took supreme effort for us not to roll in the floor laughing!
ZombiesWhile visiting a grandparent at a nursing home, Nathan saw many residents who were experiencing difficulty walking - stiff legs, slow pace, and little mobility. When we left he said to me "Papa Beene, Senior Citizens remind me of zombies! Sad, but true.
Girls Already?Remembering that Nathan is still young (almost 8 now), we were talking about dressing nicely. He informed me that he wanted to look nice for the girls. He's about 8 years ahead of where I was at that age!
Calling All TeachersSo we were talking about where people were from and the subject of people from another country came up. "I'm from another country - Oklahoma." Nathan says (he was born there). I told him that Oklahoma is a state, not a country. Nancy chimed in with "Yes Nathan, a state is like London, or Europe!". It sounds like I'll be enrolling 2 students in geography class!
A Toe by Any Other NameNathan was telling us about having cut his foot, so we asked to see it. We wree holding his foot but couldn't see where the cut was, so we asked him which toe it was. "The thumb!", he answered! Sad thing is, we knew exactly what he meant.
Fisherman - NOT!I took Nathan on his first fishing trip last weekend and he really enjoyed himself. Between us we caught about 20 fish, including 8 perch big enough to take home. He was a bit squeemish about gutting/cleaning the fish and when I asked him to help wash the fish after I scaled them, he put on a big pair of yellow rubber gloves, the kind Nancy uses for cleaning the house. He is such a city boy!
Last Name LogicNathan and I were talking about California and he told me that was where his father lived. Nathan has never seen his father, but talks about him often. I asked Nathan what was his father's name? He told me "Greg". When I asked what his father's last name was, Nathan thought about it, and very seriously told me "Well, Papa Beene, I guess his last name is Beene, 'cause that's my last name!". It made perfect sense to me!
New Starbuck OfferingNathan had gone to Starbucks and we asked him what he had bought. "Strawberry crappuccino", he says. We wondered what he would get if he actually ordered that from Starbucks!
Coin TossNathan was at the table, showing Nancy how to spin a coin. He and I had been working on flipping a coin so I told him to show Nancy. He turns to her and says "Nancy, head or toes!" - close, but not quite right.
It Sounds Like HellNathan was in the back seat of the car, listening to music on a CD player. Nancy and I heard him repeating the phrase "I said Hell!", over and over. I had Nancy listen to the music player, which was saying "Hail!", as in "Hail Caesar!". We clarified for Nathan which of the two was okay to say!
God's TVWe were passing the Dallas Cowboy stadium and my wife was explaining to Nathan that the roof has a big hole built into it. I told him that it was so that God could watch the Cowboys play. "Doesn't God have a TV?", he said!Worst Case GuessWe were calling my sister tonight, just to say hello. Nathan had the phone and after it rang several times with no answer, he said "Well, I guess they're dead, or something!". We certainly hope it's the something!Texas MannersIs he a Texan or what? Nathan and I were over at Arlene's and he wanted to ask her a question. She and I were talking so Nathan says "Excuse me, m'am" - totally Texan thing to say!God's Will Be DoneSo I was complaining to Nathan about why Nancy gets to keep her car in the garage and I have to keep my car out on the street. So Nathan tells me "Because God made it that way". What could I say?Who's Patronizing WhomSo Nathan and I are in the car and he's asking me about every sign there is - he spells it and asks me what it means. B..A..N..K , B..O..O..T..S. Then we see a sign "BROOKS", which is a local music company. I try to find a way to describe it so he knows what I mean, so I say "A company that sells music stuff, like pianos and guitars!". Nathan surprises me and says, "Oh Papa, you mean instruments?". I laughed out loud - he knew words I didn't expect him to know!By Any Other NameNancy was telling Nathan that he needed to eat some vegatables for dinner. He told her "I don't like vegatables, but I will eat some corn!".Young EngineerI was teaching Nathan how the left hand thumb and forefinder make the letter L - signifying the left hand. So, he said "L is for left and not-L is for right!" It made a electronics engineer proud that my grandson was learning Boolean logic at such an early age!In the SpotlightNathan and PaPa Beene went to the baseball park so he could run the bases. When we got there the bases were removed but it looked like someone had paint the dirt orange to show where the bases should be. Turns out that the setting sun just happened to relfect, from the overhead lights, a dull orange reflection exactly where the bases should have been! Spooky!Were We Like ThatHolly was slow getting out of bed on a school day and Nathan had already bathed and dressed. The ran to her bed and yelled "Mommy GET UP! I want to go to school!" - you have to love the attitude (not quite the one I had when I was that age).The Thought Was ThereNathan and I, his mother, were out shopping when he saw a bag of pork skins chips. He looked at me and said "Mama, are those pig chips"!!!! The girl in front of us just turned around and luaghed :)Using the Words He KnowsNathan was with me in the closet, where Nancy keeps several bottles of perfume. He pointed to them and said, "Who do all these smell-goods belong to?". When he doesn't know the word for something he does the best he can!How Many Chances Has He HadNathan and I, his mother, were talking and I was questioning him about something he said. He then looks at me with this little grin and squinted eyes and says "Mom, have I ever steered you wrong?"Call It Just Like It SoundsI asked Nathan if he had a bicycle. He said yes, and that it had a "honker" on it (meaning a horn!).Alaska Comes To TexasWhen asked a questions, Nathan has begun to say "Yepper", instead of yes. He got that from him Mom or Aunt (I don't know which), when he was in Alaska.Stomp Your Feet Now and ThenNathan got in trouble and had to sit quietly in a spot on the floor until I let him play again. Unfortunately, he started pouting and lay down in a pity-pile in the floor on the other side of a chair - out of sight. He was so quiet that I forgot he was there. I had to be reminded by family to tell him he could go play! Poor Nathan!Nathan in ChargeWhen Nancy and I were at breakfast Nathan invented a game for us to play. When we asked how to win the game, he said "I will be the winner-sayer!". Guess he didn't know the word referee or judge.It's All in How You AskNathan spent the night at my place. I was awakened at 6am and Nathan whispered - "Papa Beene, would you do me a favor?". I asked what it was and he said "Can I play crayola games?" - meaning the www.crayolo.com online games. At 6am in the morning! I guess there's no time like the present to play.Watch Me, PleaseNathan was at the Howard's lakehouse, playing with Colton, 7 years old. Colton was running on the cement outside and fell, resulting in a nasty, bloody scrape on his hip. He was crying horribly, and was inside getting tended to by Brenda. Colton was being coddled by everyone b/c the scrape was so bad. The whole time, Nathan was watching all of this attention. I guess he decided he needed some too. So he came up to Brenda and showed her his pinky and said it REALLY hurt, and he needed a band-aid. In truth, nothing was wrong...he just didn't want the attention off of him. So to humor him, Brenda gave him a band-aid for that 'hurt' finger and told him he probably needed a band-aid more for his feelings rather than his finger. Nathan told her he agreed with her. Not 2 minutes later, the band-aid was ripped off and thrown away.Come On, Give Grandpa Some AttentionI called Nathan to tell him that I called to say I loved him and to wish him a happy birthday. When I said those two things he said "Is that all you wanted to tell me?". I said yes and he said "Ok, goodbye" and hung up on me! I guess he didn't have time to chat, or anything to say himself. He was about to have his birthday party at his Nana's and was a bit pre-occupied!4 Year Old Boy Patronizes a 30 Year Old WomanCarmon had asked Nathan what his teacher's name was and she needed him to repeat it because the phone connection was poor. On the third repeat, an exasperated Nathan said to Carmon - "Aunt Carmon, now say it with me ... Miss Gilbert!". There's no slight like being patronized by a 4 year old!My Dear HolmesAfter coming downstairs Nathan and I couldn't find Nancy. He spotted a Gummy Bear candy on the floor. It was in direct line between the candy jar and the front door. He explained to me that Nancy had gone for a walk and had dropped the candy on the way out. Turns out he was exactly correct! What a detective he will make!We Know Where He Heard ThisNathan says " Mom, i'm not going to argue about this anymore" after many uh-huhs and uh-uhs about something Mom can't even remember.Calls It Like He Sees ItWhile in the traffic of a Rangers baseball game just letting out Nathan yells, "Why is everyone Bustin' out of here??"Big Shoulders for a Little ManNathan, Carvey and Amy went to the Rangers game. When we got there, we realized the game time had been changed and it was at 3pm instead of 7pm. Amy and Carvey told Nathan they were so sorry, but we were not going to the game. Nathan said, "It's okay, guys....we can go to another one" while rubbing Amy's shoulder (consoling her).Well, It's In the Same Place as a BoneNathan didn't know the word for the center part of corn on the cob, so he told Nancy "Don't eat the bone of the corn!".The Big Question About WomenNathan's bathing and I'm taking a shower, at which point he says "I can see your teetee". I told him "Yep, all boys have one". A nd he says "Girls too?". "Nope, I say". Then right to the big question he says "But how can they go pee?"Yes, He Is An Engineer's GrandsonSo Nancy is explaining to Nathan about children losing teeth and growing their permanent ones. She tells him that the tooth fairy will take the tooth if it's left under the pillow, and leave money. Rather than ask how much, or say 'gross', Nathan asks "What does she do with them?".Feeling His OatsToday, at Tom Thumb, Nathan had a piece of trash and reached down to the floor slowly to throw it down - the whole while, looking me right in the eye. If I hadn't told him to put the trash in the trashcan, he would have left it right there on the floor!He Has a PlanPapa Beene, can I have 4 pieces of candy - 'cause I'm four years old. (We've heard this one a lot!)It's Always Someone Else's FaultNancy, it's your fault. You made me eat too much licorice and my tummy hurts! (This was days after the event but he remembered to blame someone)Startled ElocutionWhen renting movies with Papa Beene, Nathan wanted Power Rangers. We find just a couple, but then chanced onto over a dozen. He was amazed and yelled out "Oh my God!". Wonder where he picked that up?Well, Excuse UsNancy and Gary, I want you to be quiet so I can relax myself ... (when Nancy and I were talking too loud?)We Use the Same Tactic When We Were KidsPaPa Beene, I was talking to Nancy ... (when Papa Beene wasn't going to let him have some candy Nathan was asking for, and Nancy was close by)Who Made You KingI'll call the construction company and tell them I'm very angry ... (for not having the train track run parallel to the road so he could watch a train go by).Dream On Little ManWhile Amy was bringing Nathan to PaPa Beene's house she stopped at a 7-11. When they went inside, Nathan said "Amy, anything I point at you're supposed to buy me."Think It, But Don't Say ItWhile watching a cartoon super-hero show, Nathan yelled out: "What the hell are they doing?" - several times in fact. That got him 5 minutes in the middle of the floor - a time out. TV off, toy gun down, and crying on Nathan's part. He begged me not to tell Nancy, Nana, or his Mommy.Word Games at Age 5Nathan and his Nana were talking about roadside reflector signs and when Nathan seemed to understand the concept, his Nana said "We're quite the pair!", to which Nathan replied No Nana, we're apples!"
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Nathan is my first grandson. At eight years old, he is my
"favorite oldest" grandson, as we say in our family.
Daniel Parker is my second grandson, or my "favorite youngest"
grandson. I don't know what we'll call the third one!